meaning to pause

Daily Intention - Peaceful Mind - Turning off the Noise and Chaos…

2011-11-18T21:07:00.000-08:00

Part eight in a ten part series - By Cindy Graham

“The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success, his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom.” - James Allen

Think for a moment the peaceful feeling you experience when you are in a church, temple or sanctuary. There is something so wonderful about being inside - something so calm, so at peace, so gentle – it is as if the whole world is far away and you have left the noisy, chaotic, media filled insanity in the parking lot. When you leave that serene, blissful calm and head back out into “life” – the noise and chaos starts up again….even though you want to hang on to that wonderful peaceful feeling….it just slips away.

Today we are challenged more than ever from the noisy environment around us. Almost everywhere we go – there is noise and a lot of it. There was even a recent “adjustment” made to TV commercials. When an ad came on, the volume increased dramatically which (in our house) caused everyone to jump and feel anxious, scrambling for the remote to turn the volume down. The advertisers thought if they increased the volume we’d somehow be more inclined to buy their product (really?).

We are not designed to sustain this kind of continual interference….our bodies, brains and well being need rest from this storm of noise and activity. In order to minimize the flurry of activity and clutter in the brain we need to have more moments of peace and calm where we can shut down the chaos. The following is an excerpt from the book “Peace of Mind in Daily Life:”

“Peace of mind is experienced when the stormy waves of the mind quell down. Real peace of mind is the companion of the silence of the mind. You get peace of mind not by thinking about it or imagining it, but by quieting and relaxing the restlessness. Your nature is absolute peace. The mind is like a room that is always full with all sorts of stuff. There is no free space there. When it is emptied, it becomes filled with peace of mind. Give your brain some rest by switching off the movements of the mind. Stop your thoughts, but stay awake, and you will experience the great ocean of peace beyond the mind. You are the consciousness beyond the mind. By stilling the mind you realize this fact. Then peace of mind will be always be with you. True peace of mind is not dependent on circumstances. It comes from the inside. The wind causes waves to arise in the sea. Restless thoughts are the winds that bring waves and storms into the mind. Learn to calm down the winds of your mind, and you will enjoy great inner peace. When you unclutter your mind, you enjoy peace of mind.”

Achieving this result and incorporating this practice does not take a lot of work. Integrating small moments of peace and calm throughout the day will have dramatic improvements on many aspects of your life. Once you allow your mind moments to free itself from noise, chaos and clutter – you open yourself up to the freedom of new possibilities – which will include a refreshed perspective on how to live peacefully inside of life’s normal daily chaos. Deepak Chopra states it best:

"Wherever you go in the midst of movement and activity, carry your stillness within you. Then the chaotic movement around you will never overshadow your access to the reservoir of creativity, the field of pure potentiality."

There are many ways to get started on the journey of seeking a peaceful mind. Here are a few to get started immediately:

· When in the car – turn the radio and cell phone off – don’t allow the noise in – focus on driving in the present moment

· When at home – turn off all TV’s, radio’s and background noise – be in the home noise free

· Consider exercising without music or Podcasts – just exercise and be with your thoughts

· Designate a quiet “sanctuary” spot in your home or work where you can go to for quiet moments – nothing fancy – just a spot that is your place to go to when a quiet moment is needed

· Read the book: “Peace of Mind in Daily Life” by Remez Sasson

· Begin each day with a mindful intention to seek out quiet moments – so that you can find peace and calm and turn off the noise

Most people need something to keep them mindful of their daily intention – so that they are aware all day of their intention to seek out quiet moments. They need something to help them remember; something that provides reminders to stay focused on what you’ve set out to do. Solution: the meaning to pause® bracelet. This bracelet gently and privately vibrates every 90 (or 60) minutes with a friendly nudge to keep you on track and mindful of your daily intention. This simple and inexpensive bracelet holds the key to keeping you focused on your daily intention and commitment to serve!

For more information go to: www.meaningtopause.com

“When we are unable to find tranquility within ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere”

-Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Daily Intention - Contributing to the world - mindful service…

2011-09-02T16:10:00.000-07:00

Part seven in a ten part series - By Cindy Graham

“Everybody can be great...because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.” --Martin Luther King Jr.

Savor for a moment the feeling you get when you do something good for someone or for the earth. There is simply nothing like it. Why is this? It’s because helping one another (serving) is exactly what we are here to do….it is the common purpose for all of mankind. Yes, we all have our individual purpose in life – but we are all bound together with the common purpose of service to one another.

“Being of service” might sound like it’s too much work….but with all things it’s not how big or how much….but more that the “service” is put into action – if even on the tiniest scale. Another benefit to doing even the tiniest thing -- it’s been scientifically proven that if someone sees you doing something good – it gives them the same great feeling that you get – and they in turn want to do something good (also known as the ripple effect).

Sometimes we become so self absorbed in our own day to day problems, issues and troubles that we lose touch with being mindful about service to others. There are literally hundreds of opportunities to do good things for people and our earth every single day – you just have to turn your mind ON to being more aware of those opportunities so that you can do them. Once you become more aware and you put yourself into motion – you can become addicted to doing good things for people – which translates to the bigger picture of contributing to the world! Here are some small examples to help you get started – go do it – put some GOOD into the world TODAY!

· If you see a piece of trash on the ground, pick it up and throw it away

· Give someone a big huge smile – BEAM happiness to others

· Say hello to a stranger – even if it seems awkward – be a “high on life” ambassador

· Send an uplifting text or e-mail to someone – letting them know you are thinking of them

· Let someone go ahead of you in the check-out line

· Give a homeless person a dollar – don’t be concerned what they will do with it – just put the kindness out there

· Tell a child how important they are, how special they are and how much they mean to this world

· Give someone your awesome parking spot that you’ve been circling around for 15 minutes looking for

· Pay for the person behind you in the bridge toll

· Instead of leaving a standard tip – leave a little more and TELL the server how wonderful they made your eating experience

It’s hard to imagine, but if every single one of us were to embrace the daily intention of “service to others” we would all be living in a perfect utopia! Since that is probably not possible, why not be the person that makes the positive choice to do good every day – and all day. To put this into action, it all begins with a daily intention. When you begin your day with the intention to do all the good that you can – you’ve set up your day to actually do it. You see, setting that intention is a personal commitment….and when you are tied to making that commitment you are more apt to get it done.

Most people need something to keep them mindful of their daily intention – so that they are aware all day of their commitment to serve others and put “some good” out in the world. They need something to help them remember; something that provides reminders to stay focused on what you’ve set out to do. Solution: the meaning to pause® bracelet. This bracelet gently and privately vibrates every 90 minutes with a friendly nudge to keep you on track and mindful of your daily intention. This simple and inexpensive bracelet holds the key to keeping you focused on your daily intention and commitment to serve!

For more information go to: www.meaningtopause.com

“The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.”
- Mitch Albom

Daily Intention – Healthy Body – Healthy Mind…

2011-05-25T09:55:00.000-07:00

Part six in a ten part series - By Cindy Graham

“Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.”

~World Health Organization

Being in good health is a desirable state for everyone – right? No one wants to be unhealthy. If this is true, then why do so many people turn their head and look the other way when it comes to doing the necessary things to attain good health? I believe that we have to balance our desire to have fun, cut loose and throw caution to the wind, with sound, proven and sustainable healthy habits. Is this easy? No, of course not, otherwise there would no illness, suffering and disease. We do however, have the capacity to find balance and live a healthy, fulfilled, exciting life by keeping our minds in sync with our bodies.

I know from experience that my desires towards good health are always positive, sound and attainable – but I seem to get off track very easily. My best laid plans can go wrong in the wink of an eye and suddenly, I am not sticking to the plans I created for the day. This is because my mind and body are not in sync. You know that little voice in your head that tells you it’s OK to watch TV rather than go for a walk? Or that same voice that tells you it’s OK to have one cookie since you deserve it (and that one cookie always turns into more!). Once you cross that line and decide to give in, the whole day goes in the toilet and from there you can’t seem to stick to any plan at all.

Why are we like this? Why are we weak and unable to create discipline about something as important as our health? It’s simply because we are easily distracted – and when we are distracted, our mind can create a separate set of plans. Yes, when our mind and our bodies are out of sync, we sabotage our desire to do the right thing.

In order to achieve our health goals we must take the necessary steps on the journey of discipline and not allow distractions to get in the way. Yes, it’s focus and balance in harmony with our body and our mind that will allow us to stay on track and be successful. It is the setting of a daily intention that will keep us on track. When you start your day with a specific and measurable daily intention, you plant the seed in your mind and your body will follow along with the plan. If you start your day without any intention, then you start out sloppy and will not achieve any specific health goal because none have been set. You must set your mind and body up for success daily!

For example, you wake up in the morning and you decide that your intention for the day will be to only eat whole foods and drink 64 oz of water. You will also wear your pedometer and review it every 90 minutes to ensure you are moving enough. It’s that easy. Set the intention, mediate and visualize how the day will look and then start your day! Because you have set this up and thought it through, you are armed to have a successful and healthy day. You can adjust your daily intention as needed by listening to what your body and health needs are.

Most people need something to help keep them on track – gentle reminders to prompt them during the day – so that distractions don’t derail their plans. Solution: the meaning to pause® bracelet. This bracelet gently and privately vibrates every 90 minutes with a friendly nudge to keep you on track and mindful of your daily intention to make a mind and body health connection and stay on track! This bracelet holds the key to keeping you focused on your daily intention and helps you stay focused and balanced during hectic and busy days.

For more information go to: www.meaningtopause.com

“Every human being is the author of his own health or disease.”

--Buddha

Daily Intention - Prayer and Meditation

2011-03-13T16:55:00.000-07:00

Part five in a ten part series - By Cindy Graham

“Prayer is more than meditation. In meditation, the source of strength is one’s self. When one prays, he goes to a source of strength greater than his own.” - Madame de Stael

I read a great short story the other day about a family and their “5 minute rule.” The four children in the family had to be ready for school 5 minutes before it was time to leave each day. They would gather around their Mom, and she would pray for each one by name, asking for the Lord’s blessing on their day. Then she’d give them each a kiss and off they’d run. What a great ritual to start every day and what a blessing to have a Mom that demonstrated such importance of gathering and pausing before the start of every day! This Mother was setting a daily intention for her family. When you start your day with quiet time to call out what you want for that day – it’s setting a daily intention.

Why are mediation and prayer important? Because silent spiritual reflection is a core need of every single human being. You can fight it and you can ignore it but the lack of meaningful quiet time to pray, reflect or meditate will catch up with you eventually. When it does, you will feel a troubling sense of emptiness accompanied by fear, uneasiness and doubt. For many people this does not happen until late in life. I saw this in the eyes of my troubled 95 year old Grandfather. To this day, it haunts me that he left this earth without any spiritual connection to anything.

Today, there is so much NOISE around us that silent reflection can be a challenge…but it is possible. You can fill your day with many refreshing and calming moments of quiet reflection by getting into the good habit of pausing several times in the day to step aside of what you are doing and give yourself the gift of brief but meaningful silence. This is why setting a daily intention of meditation or prayer is so critical. If you start your day with a 1, 5 or 10 minute intention setting session, you are armed and set for the day. Let’s determine what category you fall under so that you can identify your starting place. Each of us fits into one of three categories:

1. Master - You are a prayer and meditation master! You pause many times every day to quietly reflect, pray and meditate. You are a joyous, fulfilled, kind, compassionate, loving human and you have a deep and meaningful understanding of your part in this world.

2. Drifter - You do pray and meditate but you drift in and out – never finding a consistent rhythm. You either allow the noise and busyness of the day to rule your life -- or when things are going well you stop because you feel you don't need meditation or prayer any longer….until the next problem or challenge comes up in your life and you begin again.

3. Searching - Deep inside you know something is not right – you’re hoping the emptiness and uncertainty will eventually go away. You do not engage in any quiet reflection, prayer or meditation. You avoid exploring the meaning of “eternity” and the haunting echo in your soul.

Most of us fall under the category of “drifter.” The good news is that we can change! We can choose to do and be anything we want. If you want to get better at prayer and meditation – you can. You just need to set your daily intention to prayer and meditation and then start your journey -- perhaps even starting your own “5 minute rule” every morning.

Most people need something to help keep them on track – gentle reminders to prompt them during the day to pause – so that distractions don’t derail them. Solution: the meaning to pause® bracelet. This bracelet gently and privately vibrates every 90 minutes with a friendly nudge to keep you on track and mindful of your daily intention to meditate, pray or reflect. This bracelet holds the key to keeping you focused on your daily intention and helps you stay true to your commitment to allow for quiet time during your hectic and busy days.

For more information go to: www.meaningtopause.com

“The value of consistent prayer is not that He will hear us,

but that we will hear Him.” ~William McGill

Daily Intention – Living in the Present Moment

2011-01-13T20:51:00.000-08:00

Part four in a ten part series - By Cindy Graham

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.” ~Buddha

It seems as if there is a lot of hype about living in the present moment today. Funny thing is….the concept is nothing new. Buddha knew the key to living a healthy and fulfilled life was to live in the present moment and he was born sometime before 1887.

Living in the present moment is how we were meant to live, but as we’ve evolved, we’ve lost the ability to do this. Many “life experts” believe this is the core reason we are a confused, unhappy, sick, and dysfunctional society. Thanks to life experts like Eckhart Tolle, we’ve been able to really define what living in the present moment means and we can examine it closely by addressing what it isn’t. It’s not dwelling on the past or worrying about the future.

Very simply – living in the present moment is about living in the now by being more aware and focused on what you are doing. If you are washing your car, then you are not thinking about anything else but washing your car. Sound boring? That’s because the life we live in today requires each of us to do 10 things at once – it’s called multitasking…and many people brag about being able to multitask. It’s a shame that a life zapper such as multitasking has been given a gold star of efficiency!

Test yourself: think about a time or a place where you have had a peaceful and calming feeling. Maybe walking on the beach at night or gardening with the birds singing or hiking amongst Redwood trees in the still of the forest. When you do these things, you are focused on them and nothing else – you are in the moment – and you are pleasantly aware of your surroundings. You’re not making lists in your mind, talking on the phone and worrying about your job.

The key to getting into the present is to fully pause and be aware of what you are doing, thinking, saying or even how you are breathing, so that you can shift to a deeper level of awareness. When you become aware of everything around you and in you – then you are in the present moment. When you stay out of the past and the future, you can find balance and joy in the present moment. The longer you can stay in that present moment, the better. Life’s normal distractions will somehow snap us all out of our comfortable present moment blanket – but with practice, you can learn to soak up the present moment and appreciate the grace and beauty of all that life has to offer.

Give yourself some time to learn this – there is no right or wrong and there are no time requirements. You can be mindful of the present moment for 5 seconds or 30 minutes – or better yet, all day! The important thing is to make the connection when you are prompted. Choose to do something calming and special rather than choosing to do nothing at all.

It is perfectly normal for your mind to wander after a few moments of being in the present moment – it happens to all of us. Don't get discouraged and stop the practice – stay with it. It might make sense to think of mindfulness in this way: If your mind wanders away from the present moment, mindfulness is really about bringing your attention back to the present moment. It’s an ebb and flow that is easy and light. Think of this process like the beach. Your body is the sandy shore and your mind is the tide. When you are in the present moment, the beach is soaking in the water that has just come in. That water might stay there or it might go back out to sea….if it does it’s OK….pause and bring the water back onto the shore. Light and easy….ebb and flow…

Most people need something to keep them on track – so that they are mindful and aware all day of their intention to be in the present moment – so that distractions don’t derail them. They need something to help them remember; something that provides reminder points during the day so that they stay in the present. Solution: the meaning to pause® bracelet. This bracelet gently and privately vibrates every 90 minutes with a friendly nudge to keep you on track and mindful of your daily intention to be in the present. This simple and inexpensive bracelet holds the key to keeping you focused on your daily intention of living in the now – the present moment!

For more information go to:

http://www.meaningtopause.com/

“Living in the moment brings you a sense of reverence for all of life's blessings.” - Oprah Winfrey

Don't Quit Anything this New Year.....Move Towards Something -- PAUSING!

2010-12-27T10:37:00.000-08:00

The majority of New Year's Resolutions have gone by the wayside before January is over and won't even be remembered two months later. The reason is simple: Most are made in response to something negative -- a habit or situation that the person wants to end. And there lies the problem - it's difficult to develop momentum from a negative response. It is always easier to move toward something rather than away from something. This year resolve to move TOWARDS pausing. There --- nothing to run from, nothing to quit!

Start your New Year PAUSING!

20% Discount on ALL purchases through 1/31/2011

www.meaningtopause.com

The 7 Spiritual Tenets of Happiness

2010-12-19T15:49:00.000-08:00

Does it seem as if everyone but you is feeling merry and bright this time of year? Instead of embracing your inner scrooge, add these uplifting habits to your daily routing and you'll find more meaning this season and all year long.

AT ANY TIME OF YEAR, about half of us are searching for ways to become happier, according to MaryAnn Troiani, a clinical psychologist and the author of Spontaneous Optimism: Proven Strategies for Health, Prosperity & Happiness. And that number grows even higher in November and December. "Stress and anxiety overwhelm us during the holidays," says Troiani. "Even people who are generally content may become blue." One of the main reasons: The images associated with the season shine a light on what may be missing in your own life. "When people are bombarded with commercials, greeting cards, and movies showing perfect families and friendships, they may start to question the quality of their own relationships," says Adam K. Anderson, Ph.D., an associate professor of psychology at the University of Toronto. "This can make them feel lonely and less fulfilled." But don't think you need to start spending all your free time with your in-laws or going to church every day to become more spiritually whole. There are some simple steps you can take to feel better--today and throughout the year.

1) SEE THE BIG PICTURE

"Becoming more spiritual is about letting go of control, being willing to go with the flow, and appreciating the surprising things that come your way when you do," says Robert J. Wicks, the author of Bounce: Living the Resilient Life. "You need to change your mindset and remember that there are other forces at work." But realizing you aren't always in the driver's seat doesn't necessarily mean you have to believe in. God; it just means you shouldn't dwell on what's upsetting you when your perfect plan doesn't work out. "When something goes wrong, take a step back, agree to just let whatever happens happen, and try to find something positive about the turn of events; it will help you relax and keep everything in perspective," says Wicks. Something else to keep in mind: You may not control what happens, but you decide how you react and what kind of person you are. This outlook helps you avoid the "why me" and "life isn't fair" thoughts that can bring you down.

2) CREATE A PEACEFUL RITUAL

In the best-selling memoir Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert healed from a hurtful divorce by spending months meditating at an Indian ashram. That's obviously not realistic for the majority of us, but we all could use some peace--away from the Internet, TV, smart phones, and Twitter! And there's evidence to show that a little break is enough. All you need to do is take a few minutes each day to focus on your breath. "Be aware of the sound it makes as you inhale the feel of it as it enters your lungs, the way your body loses tension when you exhale," says Anderson. "It's okay if you're a little bored at first. Acknowledge that thought and then let it go." This helps develop mindfulness, or being in the moment. "Cultivating this quality allows you to become more flexible when dealing with tough situations, to be open to an experience without labeling it good or bad," says Anderson. And the benefits don't stop there. A study in Psychological Science showed that those who meditated regularly for three months had longer attention spans and performed better at detail-oriented tasks, while researchers from Stanford found that this daily practice helps you deal with anxiety.

3) GIVE YOURSELF A TUNE-UP

There's a reason that music is a prominent part of almost every religion in the world. "It expresses beliefs, emotions, and attitudes that words can't convey," says Donald Hodges, Ph.D., a professor of music at the University of North Carolina, Greensboro. Part of the reason it causes a rush is physiological--songs trigger the release of endorphins, those feel-good hormones that give us a natural high. Another component is emotional: "Hearing certain tracks reminds us of past events and the joy we felt then," says Hodges. Studies from Wake Forest University and Seattle University found that listening to music does everything from lowering anxiety and blood pressure to helping you deal with pain. Just use it the right way: Hodges notes that numerous studies have found that when music is always in the background, it may lose some of its potency to speak to you emotionally. So try to make it the focal point. Rather than turning on the TV when you get home, relax to one of your favorite CDs.

4) INCREASE FACE TIME WITH FRIENDS

You texted your sister, G-chatted with a guy you like, and sent status updates to your 300 friends on Face book, but when's the last time you met anyone for lunch? There's nothing wrong with social networks (in fact, they're a good way to keep in touch), but if you're feeling alone, the solution can't be found solely online. Seeing someone on a monitor doesn't have the same intimacy level as face-to-face contact does, and it can result in you feeling more disconnected than ever. "That loneliness should act in a similar way to thirst, motivating you to change your behavior in some way," says John Cacioppo, Ph.D., the director of the Center of Cognitive and Social Neuroscience at the University of Chicago. "There's a deep need to have a sense of belonging that comes with having personal interactions with friends." Don't let your real-world relationships languish--make a date at least once a week.

5) DO GOOD, FEEL FABULOUS

"Whenever you spend time or energy on someone else--be it picking up lunch for a swamped co-worker or shoveling your neighbor's car out of the snow--the other person gets the helping hand and you walk away with a lighter spirit and a good feeling about yourself," says Wicks. The reason for that high: By being compassionate and helping somebody out, you become more aware of all that you have and are generally happier with your lot in life. So this month, spend one Saturday morning at a soup kitchen or drop off an action figure at a Toys-for-Tots drive.

6) SURROUND YOURSELF WITH NATURE

If the only green you see is a glance at your Christmas tree between laundry loads, you're missing out on a key way to lift your spirit. A study published in the Journal of Environmental Psychology found that spending as little as 20 minutes in natural surroundings makes you feel relaxed, vital, and energetic. Although the study didn't address why nature is revitalizing, Richard Louv, the author of Last Child in the Woods and an upcoming book about the restorative power of the natural world, has a theory: "Spirituality begins with a sense of wonder--something that's more likely to occur when you're outside than while on your computer." To put it another way: When you catch sight of a deer or you hear a woodpecker pecking, it fills you with amazement. So disconnect and get outside for a hike with your family or a 30-minute run.

7) FORGIVE AND FORGET

Here's the easiest trick in the world for dealing with situations in which someone makes you mad: Try to imagine what's motivating them. The guy who cut you off in traffic may be racing his pregnant wife to the hospital, or your boss may have snapped at you because she's dealing with budget issues. Who knows? It isn't always about you. "Realizing that you're not at the center of everything should be a relief," says Anderson. "It frees you up to be forgiving and understanding." In the same way that you're striving to become a better person, assume others are too. Trying to accept their imperfections--as well as your own--is what spirituality is all about.

JENNA MAHONEY, a writer in New York City, attends the annual St. Patrick's Cathedral Christmas concert every year in NYC to give her spirit a boost during the holidays.

Daily Intention – Kindness

2010-11-11T09:06:00.000-08:00

Part three in a ten part series - By Cindy Graham

“Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness; kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.”
--Mother Teresa

It might seem odd to read an article on how to be more kind….but pause and ask yourself if you could be better at it. We all want to believe that we are genuinely proficient at this important subject, but if we are honest we will admit that we are good at this…..sometimes – when it’s convenient. There, I said it – and now that the truth has been revealed, let’s explore how setting a simple daily intention can help us become a more kind and genuine human being.

The bracelet in the picture says it all; Kindness begins with me. You are in control of how you act, what you think, what you say and do…so kindness is something you can represent. You have a choice when engaging with people…you can choose to be kind or you can choose not to be. Most of the time, we are all so busy (rushing around) that we aren’t even conscious of whether or not we are being kind.

For the sake of simplifying, here are some other words to describe kind; caring, sympathetic, nice, gentle, thoughtful, compassionate, humane, and considerate. WOW – kindness is a whole lot of good!

For a moment think about how it feels when someone is kind to you. When someone does something nice for me, it makes me remember that I want to be like that to other people! It’s been scientifically proven that when another human being witnesses a random act of kindness, their health, well being and mood is greatly improved. Think about how you feel when you come out of a movie regarding the goodness of humanity….and how much you want that feeling to stay with you. It’s because we really want to live in a world where we are all kind and good to each other…and it all starts with you.

There is a Greek proverb that states: “kindness begets kindness” which is also similar to “as you sow, so shall you reap." These sayings have been around since the start of man…and with good reason – they are rock solid truth! When you put kindness into everything you do, say and touch, it will come back to you 20 fold! Ready to give it a try….just one day is all it should take to get hooked on kindness!

Begin each morning with a 5 minute meditation on your daily intention of kindness. Sit quietly and envision yourself being kind, compassionate, gentle, caring and considerate with all people you come in contact with. Think of some things you can do to help others at work, think of places you can perform some random acts of kindness, picture yourself smiling throughout the day – passing the goodness from person to person – creating a ripple effect.

Once you’ve set your intention, you’ll need to perform self checks throughout the day so that you stay on track and don’t get distracted. It’s human nature to lose focus and become sidetracked in the busy lifestyle we live in today. This is why most people fail at keeping commitments – the distractions are everywhere in this overly modern, high tech, noisy society.

Should you find that you need some help staying focused on your daily intention, consider the meaning to pause® bracelet to provide regular, gentle reminders. The bracelet gently and privately vibrates every 90 minutes with a friendly nudge to be mindful of your daily intention of kindness. This simple and inexpensive bracelet holds the key to keeping you focused on your intention – all day long. The bracelet was created to help people pause and connect to something meaningful….and what’s more meaningful than kindness?

For more information go to: www.meaningtopause.com

“When we feel love and kindness toward others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared

for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace.” -Dalai Lama

When we are kind, caring people, we feel good about our own life and we are contributing to the well-being of everyone around us! Living with the daily intention of kindness is good for you, good for your family, good for your community and good for our world!

LIVE WITH INTENTION – Kindness begins with YOU!

Daily Intention - Erase Negative Thinking

2010-10-05T19:58:00.000-07:00

Part two in a ten part series - By Cindy Graham

“Be vigilant; guard your mind against negative thoughts.” ~Buddha

There are thousands of quotes, books, articles and blogs about the tremendous power of positive thinking and the dangers of negative thinking. The entire medical community has proven that negative thinking is not good for anyone – it simply serves no purpose in life.

Do you think you know all there is to know about negative thinking? Might want to think again….

There are many types of negative thinking that come in various forms; worry, anxiety, stress, depression and fear. Negative thinking can span from generalized everyday worry, being critical and judgmental of others, self doubt, fear of the future, to distorted catastrophic thoughts. Here are some examples of negative thinking.

• Worry – One of the more common forms of negative thinking and one that can lead to long term damage. Occasional worry about a single event is perfectly normal. If the worry is targeted at something specific and has and end date, then it’s most likely harmless because the event will pass and the worry will be over.

• Judgmental and Critical Thoughts – Everyone is judgmental and critical. This is negative thinking – and you might not even know that you do this. When we judge or are critical of others, our minds are in a state of negative behavior. This is simply not healthy.

• Self-doubt – When you are critical of yourself or you doubt your abilities, you are making negative judgments that put your mind in a state of negative reflection. When this judgment is happening, your mind takes off and wanders into other areas that continue with further self doubt, which can lead to self-loathing, a terrible condition that can cause long term health problems.

• Anxiety – While more common today, anxiety is widespread in our society. Poor health, family concerns, traveling, money problems, work related issues and clinical fears can all be known as General Anxiety Disorder (GAD). This is often treated with drugs and many times leads to other more debilitating illness and disorders.

• Stress – A common form of negative thinking. Stress is related to both external and internal factors. External factors can include your job, your relationships with others, your home, and all the situations, challenges, difficulties and expectations you're confronted with on a daily basis. Internal factors determine your body's ability to respond to, and deal with, the external stress-inducing factors. Internal factors which influence your ability to handle stress include your nutritional status, overall health and fitness levels, emotional well-being, and the amount of sleep or rest you get.

• Depression – This is one of the most diagnosed illnesses. It’s my personal belief that depression is something that starts out as a controllable process – but if not treated early, the sufferer can move into a state of clinical depression which might be treated with prescription drugs.

• Fear of the Future; Dread of the Past – This kind of negative thinking is perhaps the most destructive. When people do not practice being in the present moment, they lose out on the joy we were meant to live in. We cannot change what has already happened, so dwelling on what has passed serves no purpose. Many times we have no control over what is going to happen in the future, yet we worry about what might or might not happen. The only space we should be in (at all times) is the now. Being in the present moment provides you with the ability to make the best choices for how you want to live your life.

• Distorted Catastrophic Thoughts – This negative thinking can dominate someone’s life to the point that they have no life at all. Distorted, negative thoughts take on a life of their own and can zap any hope of a joy-filled life. Anyone that suffers from this dangerous form of negative thinking lives in a “what if” world. The process is called “spiraling” and it is something that starts off as a small, insignificant negative thought. The sufferer then goes into a thought pattern of “what if” and that small insignificant negative thought manifests itself into a catastrophic event that causes the suffer to become paralyzed with fear.

When we allow our minds to be in any of these states for a prolonged period of time, we cause internal and external damage not only to our lives but the lives of our loved ones.

Our minds are so powerful - we can allow our thoughts to take control of our body and our mind and worry ourselves from a mild concern to a full frenzy in a matter of minutes. Why does this happen? It happens because we lose control of our thoughts and we ALLOW the negative thinking to get in front of us. When the negative thinking becomes a habit, a pattern develops and we lose the ability to control our thoughts. Many of us have unconsciously created a negative thinking habit.

There is a solution to identifying and erasing negative thinking – and you can train yourself to control, and get in front of negative thoughts. The challenge is remembering to perform continual “self-checks” throughout the day to examine what state your mind is in and then correct any negative thinking right away. You may need something to help you remember to perform a “self-check” and train your mind to accept only positive thinking!

Solution: the meaning to pause® bracelet. This bracelet gently and privately vibrates every 90 minutes with a friendly reminder to be mindful of your daily intention of erasing negative thinking and replacing those thoughts with powerful positive thinking! This simple and inexpensive bracelet holds the key to keeping you focused on your thoughts – all day long. This really works and I am speaking from experience! The bracelet was created to help me pause, examine my thinking and then erase any negative thoughts by replacing them with positive reinforcement. It solves the problem perfectly!

For more information go to: www.meaningtopause.com

When we eliminate negative thinking, we can improve who we are and who we really want to be. When we are positive, uplifting people, we feel good about our own life and we are contributing to the well-being of everyone around us! Living with the daily intention of erasing negative thinking is good for you, good for your family, good for your community and good for our world!

LIVE WITH INTENTION – CHOOSE TO LIVE A POSITIVE LIFE!

Daily Intention – Yes, You Can!

2010-09-19T11:00:00.000-07:00

Part one in a ten part series - By Cindy Graham

I wholeheartedly know and trust that we are not meant to go through each day aimlessly allowing life to happen to us without meaningful attachment to anything. Every day should be as important as the next. Every day is an opportunity to improve, to be kinder, to be less judgmental, to be more grateful, healthier, happier, more fulfilled and to continue growing into a better person.

I believe that we are to plan and create every day to be full of rich, meaningful, expressive, joy filled INTENTION. The only person that has control over your day is you. So why not design how you want to live your life every single day?

Sound difficult? This is actually very simple…and you can begin right now!

Let’s start with the definition of intention:

a determination to act in a certain way
what one INTENDS to do or bring about
design or create

So if we use intention in the truest sense of the term, it is very clear – “intention” is something that we do. If you follow the simplest path to get started, you will find some quiet time; in a quiet place, where you can listen to your soul speak to you so that you can examine a few things about your life:

Who do you really want to be?
What do you want to do better?
Is there an empty feeling in some part of your life?
What distractions or obligations block you from feeling pure joy every day?

Once you’ve been able to identify these things, you become more aware of where you need to focus and then you can begin to live your life with intention! Ready?

Begin each morning with a 5 minute meditation on what your intention will be for that day. I don’t mean the deep, intense, sit down on the floor with legs crossed meditation – I mean 5 minutes of quiet time to get yourself in alignment with your mind and body….to commit to living the day YOU want to LIVE! Be sure not to take on too much….enter into this gently but deliberately. Take it for a test run. Pick something uncomplicated but something you know needs some work. Then, start your day!

The key to living with intention is to not let yourself get distracted because of your normal daily activities. We are humans and we are flawed. We can have the best intention – but can become easily distracted throughout the day and lose sight of our daily intention goals. When this happens, we tend to give up and throw in the towel. This only serves to push us closer to feeling as if we have no control over our own life…when in reality; the control over our own life is all we really have (so ironic). There is nothing that feels worse than not keeping a commitment to ourselves – it’s so discouraging. BUT – when we do keep our commitments to ourselves – it’s empowering – we feel strong, joy-filled, courageous, accomplished, proud and unstoppable!

Most people need something to keep them on track – so that they are mindful all day of their intention – so that distractions don’t derail them. They need something to help them remember; something that provides “check” points during the day so that they stay on track. Solution: the meaning to pause® bracelet. This bracelet gently and privately vibrates every 90 minutes with a friendly nudge to keep you on track and mindful of your daily intention. This simple and inexpensive bracelet holds the key to keeping you focused on your daily intention – all day long. This really works and I am speaking from experience! The bracelet was created to help me connect to meaningful moments in my busy, distracting day. It solves the problem perfectly!

For more information go to: http://www.meaningtopause.com/

When we keep our commitments to ourselves we feel good about ourselves. When we feel good about our own life, we are actually contributing to the human race – by being in the game! Living with intention is participation in life at its best! Living with successful daily intention is good for you, good for your family, good for your community and wonderful for our world!

LIVE WITH INTENTION – LIVE A JOY-FILLED LIFE!

...and THIS is why we must pause...

2010-06-06T13:08:00.000-07:00

Oh glorious day!

I was working at my desk for a good part of the morning. While very unusual for me, I had not used my pauses in the matter in which I advocate we are supposed to (yes, I am human and flawed).

Then my third pause went off and I swear it was more powerful than the usual gentle nudge. I decided that I would get up, stretch and walk into the back yard to get a breath of fresh air.

Today is a magnificent day in Northern California! The sky is a hypnotic blue and the greens from the foliage around me took my breath away. I walked around the yard, proud of myself for taking this pause. My cat Sophie was in tow and we were just taking it all in.

As I got close to one of our Pistachio trees, a bird flew out. This bird moved so fast I could not tell what species it was. But then I saw her for all her glory…..a big female Robin. She was not at all happy that I came so close! Her feathers were fluffed up and she landed 6 feet away on my neighbors shed – to keep an eye on me.

I am very, very respectful of nature, so I do not make a habit of crossing the line….but I knew there must be a nest with eggs in it – I could feel that she was telling me to go ahead and have a look (female to female) and then get out. I got it…

After getting a ladder and my iPhone (which takes better pictures than most high-end cameras), I went back to the scene. Mama Robin was still on the roof shed waiting patiently for my investigation to be done with.

As I worked my way through the leaves and branches, there it was – a perfectly round nest with two perfect turquoise blue eggs sitting so perfectly next to each other – it brought tears to my eyes that this perfection was taking place in my back yard.

I quickly flicked a few pictures, said a little prayer for those babies and dismounted the ladder. When I got back into the house and looked at these pictures it hit me……AHHHHHH……the pause….this is WHY we must pause! These little Robins are going to hatch and fly away soon….I would have missed the whole thing had I not purposely paused.

Moral of the story: PAUSE….this stuff is supposed to happen to us but we move from task to task so abruptly that we run the risk of missing it all.

P.S. For those of you that are worried that my cat might get to the nest – don’t -- Sophie is so fat she struggles to get on and off of our bed….she’ll never make it near that tree!

A gift from the storm...

2010-04-13T18:59:00.000-07:00

Here's the gift from the storm! If you take the time to PAUSE and reflect on how something so beautiful can come from such dark, cloudy, rainy skies...it really gives you a reason to smile. A rainbow arches over a large piece of land and gives everyone underneath it and around it the opportunity to rejoice!

The Not So Big Life.....

2010-03-27T20:33:00.000-07:00

http://www.notsobiglife.com/community/blog_view.php?t=323

A Timing Device to Bring You to Presence

by Sarah on 3.23.2010, 4:51 pm

A couple of weeks ago we received an email from two women who've invented a new timing device, called meaning to pause that I thought might be useful to those of you who are implementing some of the strategies for coming to presence that I describe in The Not So Big Life. The device is an attractive bracelet that vibrates once every ninety minutes, bringing you to awareness of the moment.

You may recall in the Your Turn exercise on p. 143 I suggest the following:

Quote: Every fifteen minutes, take ten seconds to pause and notice what is happening in your body and your mind.

You’ll need a timer with a repeat function to alert you to the fifteen-minute intervals. There are all sorts of watches and vibrating clocks available in the marketplace these days; a number of them are featured on the Not So Big Life website. (Click here, and scroll down to the Timing Devices topic toward the end of the page). You can even use an egg timer in a pinch, though if you are around others much of the day, it might drive them crazy in short order, so the silent variety of reminder is preferable.

Although this exercise sounds simple, its effects can be profound because it will bring you into the moment over and over again.

This new "meaning to pause" device is a perfect tool for this Your Turn exercise. Although it is programmed to go off every 90 minutes, in some ways this may be an improvement over the more frequent cycle I recommend in the exercise. I've been using my new meaning to pause bracelet for two days now and I find that I'm much less likely to tune it out (and forget to pause) because it is infrequent enough that one is much less likely to ignore it.

(If you've used the 15 minute exercise, you may know that a new conditioned pattern develops very quickly and you can easily start to tune out the reminder to pause. It really teaches you how quickly you can be conditioned, and simply tune out distractions! Quite an eye opener.)

In any case, I thought you might find this a useful supplement to your own Not So Big Life. If you do get one of these bracelets, or a different device, let me know what you discover as you use it.
Sarah

Pause to see God's work....

2010-02-14T20:04:00.000-08:00

WOW! Could not believe my eyes. This picture does not do it justice....but this sky was magnificent!
Good thing I PAUSED to go outside and take a couple of deep breaths...might have missed this beauty!

A Divine Pause...

2010-01-30T19:44:00.000-08:00

This afternoon I was driving around doing a bunch of errands...not paying attention to anything special (as usual - UG!) and my pause went off.

Taking special care to be in the present....I turned my thoughts to the song playing. It was "Sunrise" by Nicole Nordeman (my favorite!). I looked up through the windshield and there it was....the most magnificent sky! It was as if God sent me a little message to slow down and pay attention to His magnificent artwork!

You know what I am talking about...it's several beaming rays of light coming down through the shadows of dark clouds that have moved aside....it's as if you can hear Angels singing.

It was just beautiful enough to pull the car over and take it all in (and of course give thanks). So I pulled out my iPhone and snapped this beauty. Can you see it? Do you hear the Angels - I hope so! Pause.....

Charming Testimonial for Married Couples Pausing...

2010-01-16T15:22:00.000-08:00

When I got the Meaning to Pause bracelet, the first thing I tried was to use the pause to think about my wife, Kristin. At the time, I was out of town and Kristin didn't have a bracelet yet. Sometimes this was a phone call or a text message, sometimes it was just me thinking, "I miss you honey." This was relationship-gold!

She really liked the support when working long hours, and it wasn't difficult to do. It's comforting to know when your partner is thinking about you. Sometimes this makes for mushy, cutesy, moments, but that is balanced by all the times you pause for a new reason, in a new way.

The pause bracelet will not listen to your excuses, it will gently nudge you to think, or act. Inevitably, I end up pausing in thanks, or in silent reflection, or maybe I suddenly remember that I need to stop at the store. There are a lot of fun ways to use it, so I queue up new ideas for my next pause.

My favorite pauses often occur when Kristin and I are together. We sync them and pause together throughout the day. When we're together, it's an excuse to glance at each other and smile. When we're apart, it makes us feel connected - like we've spent more time together that day than we actually did.

Since we both work long hours on opposite shifts, it helps us feel like we're still on the same planet. We find ourselves reflecting on the important things that are often swept under the rug. When a family member is ill, or a baby is being born, pauses tend to focus on these events. For us, it's a great way to maintain our sanity, and it helps us get the most out of life.

Ken & Kristin

PAUSING....Finding Time For YOU!

2010-01-14T19:57:00.000-08:00

Within each of us there is a well of energy that must be regularly replenished. When we act as if this well is bottomless, scheduling a long list of activities that fit like puzzle pieces into every minute of every day, it becomes depleted and we feel exhausted, disconnected, and weak. Refilling this well is a matter of finding time to focus on, nurture, and care for ourselves, or "you time." Most of us are, at different times throughout the day, a spouse, a friend, a relative, an employee, a parent, or a volunteer, which means that down time, however relaxing in nature, is not necessarily "you time." Though some people will inevitably look upon "you time" as being selfish, it is actually the polar opposite of selfishness. We can only excel where our outer world affairs are concerned when our own spiritual, physical, and intellectual needs are fulfilled.

Recognizing the importance of "you time" is far easier than finding a place for it in an active, multifaceted lifestyle, however. Even if you find a spot for it in your agenda, you may be dismayed to discover that your thoughts continuously stray into worldly territory. To make the most of "you time," give yourself enough time on either side of the block of time you plan to spend on yourself to ensure that you do not feel rushed. Consider how you would like to pass the time, forgetting for the moment your obligations and embracing the notion of renewal. You may discover that you are energized by creative pursuits, guided meditation, relaxing activities during which your mind can wander, or modes of expression such as writing.

Even if you have achieved a functioning work-life balance, you may still be neglecting the most important part of that equation: you. "You time" prepares you for the next round of daily life, whether you are poised to immerse yourself in a professional project or chores around the home. It also affords you a unique opportunity to learn about yourself, your needs, and your tolerances in a concrete way. As unimportant as "you time" can sometimes seem, it truly is crucial to your wellbeing because it ensures that you are never left without the energy to give of yourself.

PAUSE to rest and improve your health...

2010-01-08T18:48:00.000-08:00

Strong work ethic? You can still justify taking a break. In fact, we NEED to take breaks -- regularly and frequently. Why? WE WORK MORE EFFECTIVELY WHEN WE DON'T WORK SO MUCH. Rest periods break our work routines. They help SHIFT OUR THINKING from its habitual, stuck patterns. They create the SPACE FOR ENERGY AND CREATIVITY to flow. They give us TIME FOR REFLECTION, so we can step back and look at what's happening in our lives with greater detachment. We become more sensitive and aware. And finally, we are stronger when we BALANCE DOING with BEING. All work and no rest throws our life out of balance and endangers our health. Our bodies and minds need sufficient rest for recuperation. This is critically important with the level of stress in our lives these days. "The time to relax is when you don't have time for it."-- Sidney J. Harris

WONDERFUL RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS: (from a meaning to pause customer)

2010-01-05T19:19:00.000-08:00

Today, on my way home from driving my daughter to school, I saw a homeless man walking with his dog. My pause had just gone off. I turned around and went to Starbucks and got him a hot chocolate and muffin. It was cold and drizzling. I just can’t imagine walking in his shoes. I gave him the hot chocolate and a treat for his dog and a Starbucks gift card. He was so nice and he was so appreciative! Not drunk or drugged out at all. Just plain homeless and in need of kindness...

Calming the "Monkey Mind"

2009-12-29T16:28:00.001-08:00

What's to be gained by calming the monkey mind?

The words "monkey mind" comes from a Buddhist description of the mind of a person who is not in the present moment. The mind of such a person is said to be likened to a monkey that goes from tree to tree tasting a piece of fruit from each and then dropping it and moving on to the next tree. As with many of us, our thought process runs in much the same way. We jump from thought to thought and project to project without really ever being in the present and fully experiencing everything we are doing at a given time.

With constant pressure to do more, keep moving and go faster, our everyday lives often do not and cannot reflect our most heartfelt values and ideas. If the axiom… YOUR LIFE IS YOUR MESSAGE is true... I shudder to think “What message I am sending?”

It's been called the monkey mind - the endless chattering in your head as you jump in your mind from thought to thought while you daydream, analyze your relationships, or worry over the future. Eventually, you start to feel like your thoughts are spinning out of control and you're left tired and confused.

One way to tame this wild creature in your head is through meditation or pausing to clear your head. It is inside your PAUSE… that you are given the opportunity to tame this mental beast… by moving beyond thought - to become aware of a thought rather than thinking a thought. The difference is subtle, however, very significant. When you are aware of your thoughts, you can let your thoughts go without letting them pull you in different directions.

Being able to concentrate is one of the tools that allow you to slow down your thought process. Using your “Daily Pauses” can be as simple as choosing… Choosing to chant, singing a devotional song, and prayer also still the mind. However you choose to tame the monkey mind, do so with firm kindness. The next time the chattering arises, notice it and then allow it to go away. Doing this in a consistent, congruent manner with each and every Pause… With practice, monkey mind will become quiet and so will you.

Take Your Time… Find Balance in a Hurried World

If you conquer your mind, you will control your life. It is that simple.

Namaste`… Molly N.

Clearing your head....

2009-12-16T15:59:00.000-08:00

meaning to pause does not suggest that pausing is easy. Many times, that gentle nudge arrives and your head is so filled with clutter, that the pause can actually become another burden mixed in with all that clutter and chaos.

TAKE NOTE; if that does happen to you and your pause is not a welcomed relief.....you are in critical condition. At that very moment - you need to step away from where you are and regroup. Force yourself to clear your head and USE THAT PAUSE wisely.

The best thing to do when you are in "critical condition" is to take 3 deep breaths....clear your head and then decide what else you want to do with that pause. It may be nothing at all.....but at least you took those deep breaths and gave your mind and body a quick, needed break.

Train yourself to get good at this - you will be amazed at how your life will become peaceful and your head clear of clutter.

Now that's a PAUSE moment!

2009-12-12T20:49:00.000-08:00

....Ahhhhhh today was a little crazy! There I was smack in the middle of running errands, the rain was pouring and my hands were full with packages as I made my way to the car. I stepped in a huge puddle and my feet were soaked. Then....as I fished my keys out of my purse, I dropped a bag filled with groceries....peanut butter, apples, rice, tofu, nuts....sprawled out all over the wet parking lot! I opened the car door, threw all the other "stuff" in the car....gathered my wet groceries, shoved them in the car, plopped myself down in the seat and then it happened.....my pause went off!

I had the best belly laugh....lasted for 10 minutes - it was magnificent!

Now - that's a pause moment.......